i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
How long can I microwave pasta with a 20 percent alcohol content?
So... on the count of three, we are going to forget last night ever happened... 1...2...3
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
What the fuck could you be doing in that room to make her yell "Beginners Luck!" over and over again?
Are we talking about who knows if I'll get naked pictures of you with a broadsword or who knows if I'll be surprised?
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
Randomize