Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
so thats when we found her crawling hands and knees up first street singing hold me closer tony danza as loud as she could
did she say where she was going
apparently she thought she was on morton hill and was trying to go back to the bars
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
And all I wanted you to do is stand there and sing who let the dogs out.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Rick two cubicles down puked and that triggered three others puking into their trash cans as well. The janitorial staff hates it when we go drinking on a work night.
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
If you walk into a place and someone says "happy birthday" while handing you a shot. You. Take. It.
I ask him how he's going, like life and stuff, and he responds "20-0 pats"
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Randomize
