i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
sick fucks of a feather flock together
I borrowed a glass of wine. And the bottle. Your cat said it was ok
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
That's how all the girlfriends are. Oh he's a boy, no worries, then BAM. I blow their boyfriend.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
