I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
I wish I could have two rating systems on iTunes. "This one is a 5 star. This one is only a 5 star when I'm baked."
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
That's what you get for drunk dialing me to ask what kind of flowers I like while outside of a strip club, after telling me you "made it rain"
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
My EX’s roommate heard about the breakup and offered to help me bang it out. I think she hates her even more than I do.
Randomize
