Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
overheard a conversation between 2 lesbians: 'back when I used to have dick sex...' oh, vegas, I so heart you
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
Found a 10-can wizard staff hidden in our closet. Did we cut someone off?
That's yours. We cut you off.
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
I got my project done and a booty call in all before 1am. I'm a professional college kid.
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
Randomize
