Dude, just walked by a homeless guy pissing on the sidewalk while he was screaming at his wang. God, I love this city.
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
In honor of the internet blackout, I think everyone needs to change their Facebook pictures to ones of them being blacked out.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
Randomize
