Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Just saw a drunk bitch in the west village peeing on a car. You are not alone.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
