maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
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