Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
Just because Aaron is a gender neutral name does not mean I am letting you name your baby after a drug dealer
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
Please tell me you've ingested more than weed and Oreos today
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Randomize
