reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
There is nothing quite so awkward as watching topless bullriding with your mother next to you..
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
The guy who was interviewing me asked if I had coke on my pants. You win this time Las Vegas
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Randomize
