He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I think rescheduling my finals around when Im going to be hungover is responsible
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
Two dudes. Loud music. Dancing shirtless possibly naked. Why would I ever need cable?!
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
It was going alright when lo and behold Tom the cock blocking tornado hits. He is the only man I know who doesn't want anyone to fuck girls.
My mind just played a snippet of me asking to be a Joey and trying to climb into your apron pocket...
not sure if destroying him emotionally was worth it but damn it's a fucking hilarious story
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
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