are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
when I said energy drinks I meant cocaine
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
i love how you just walk into that dealer's house every time without knocking, yet you don't even know his name
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
Randomize
