No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
do herpes really smell.
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
i want us to warm up up with us making out while i lay you down touching and feeling all the spots you know are going to get you warmed up. im gonna move down your body kissing every inch as i move down past your panty line ;)
Did you watch the carolina game tonight?
Unlike bears, this weekend is not the #1 threat to America. It is, however, the #1 threat to my liver
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I should not be so motivated by a penis, but I am
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Randomize