Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
Also, rendered a whole bar silent last night when I told a guy to take off his panties and take a shot out of my cleavage. Video to follow...
My mom told me to get it out of my system now bc once I hit 30 it's not acceptable to get "white girl wasted".
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Do you own a cuff key and know where Karen lives?
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
It's really life affirming to be at a wedding thinking wow I took your husbands virginity
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
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