discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
Her thighs are so strong. I thought my head was gonna get crushed when I was eating her out
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Just re-gained consciousness in the freshman girls dorm. Normally this would be awesome but I'm on the floor surrounded by chicks doing their homework. This makes me uncomfortable but I don't think they know I'm awake yet. If I b-line for the door can you come get me?
It's not socially acceptable to be drunk in adult world. That fact makes me die a little inside.
Buying a pregnancy test at Walmart in the middle of the night in the middle of Tennessee is not really how I imagined my 25th year on this planet starting out...
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
I don't know why this person would ask for help. It sounds pretty OK to me. Also, I'd steal those bagpipes.
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
According to my bank account I spent a penny some where
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