Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I really would enjoy sexual intercourse with you.
Most formal booty call EVER
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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