That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
My rule for unemployment is that I can't smoke before noon.
I haven't gotten up before 1 though, so it hasn't really impacted me.
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
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