Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
And I wrote a rap so it was actually a productive afternoon minus not paying our bills.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
I'm at this kids house trying to figure out if I pissed in his kitchen new years eve. Lmao, stop letting me drink.
I thought monday through wednesday was a YOLO free zone.
YOU ARE NOT A BOTTLE OF RUM THEREFORE I DONT KNOW HOW TO LOVE YOU
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
he told me his feelings for me AFTER sex, so that means he meant it right?
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize