this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
i blame lastnights decisions on friday the 13th
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
thanks. im glad you find me better in your comparison between me and fat girl porn.
I'm currently sitting on the floor of a hostel reception area taking swigs of straight vodka, singing with people whose English doesn't go far beyond Lion King songs. I thought you might appreciate it.
Negotiating with my body. We're ok. Violent upheaval is not necessary.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Randomize
