Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
I'm just gonna go nail your roommate after we break up anyway.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
I don't think I'm emotionally ready for this blow job.
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
I was woken up in my old house by the new residents ... I don't even have a Key anymore
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Randomize