I only kidnapped one of them. chill
the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
Between my sister puke and rallying at the bar and my brother sending a drunk passed out naked pic in which his dick was exposed, I don't know which sibling to be more proud of this weekend.
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Randomize