before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
she pinky promised me she was 18
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Would a ten year old streaker be inappropriate?
That's the stuff legends are made of
Saw you fall down on Jefferson and a cop drove by and shook his head. How you didnt get arrested after the party you went to on saturday is beyond me.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
I don't know when it is this year, but if I ever text you an illegible text that also happens to contain sharks, Shark Week started.
Dude, I can't even reach my asshole to wipe it. I have a lot more to be thankful for this Thanksgiving.
I can't help you there
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
We have such a parasitic relationship. But the kind where the parasite benefits from the relationship. Like the pilot fish and a shark. The fish gets the leftover food scraps from the shark and the shark gets a free bath from it.
that's so insightful.
Randomize