We're facebook friends in real life
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
I guess it was to be expected that I was put on somebody's list called penis socket.
his finger was half off and he was more concerned that he wasnt at home shooting cucumbers out of his potato gun.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
