no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
So ps i'm not pregnant with any athletes illegitimate children : )
someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
Dude he fell into my wall and left an imprint then decided to have sex with the door open. Vents carry noise pretty well
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
I'm excited I love mornings when I'm not sober
My sister just showed me a snap chat that I don't remember sending, it was a picture of me with two big macs in my bra with just the words "BURGER TITS"
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
Did you smoke and go to the aquarium again?
Yeah like stabbing myself through the eye with a coffee stir and bleeding out all over the office rug
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize