What I dont get about To Catch a Predator is who the fuck still uses chat rooms?
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
he came over wasted, used the bathroom, drank some water, and fell asleep holding my hand. what kind of a fuck buddy does that??
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
last night i reached the point where my boob implants paid for themselves in free drinks. to celebrate lets go out and get more free drinks tonite.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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