Omg. I just woke up in a room full of naked people
there are singles shoved down my panties. this is the type of summer job i always wanted.
why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
I was wondering where I've seen this kid then I remembered I saw him doing lines of blow of his gf's leg while she was sleeping last week.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Blood everywhere...karaoke was nice
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
The power of my boobs compel you
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
Randomize
