I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
you made me have a moment of silence for the half of a sub sandwich that you dropped on the floor earlier
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
I got to find out the airplane alcohol limit, and somehow I made it through the flight.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
I'm trying to ve beat feiesnd sent.
I apparently made a "health and fitness" subcatagory called "drugs" on mint at some point. I used it to catagorize all of my nyc atm withdrawls for $60 haha
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
We only initially bonded over boobs and sarcasm
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
I woke up under a house in Key West
Randomize