We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Drinking wine in my childhood bed getting ready to go to sleep in order to wake up for my menial temp job. Thanks, college degree, I can handle the real world.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
I'll text you tomorrow when I'm not in someone's torture cave if I don't by noon call for help.
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