you fell asleep during kickboxing this morning
how does that even happen??
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
Dude are you wearing a trashbag right now?....
I seemed to have misplaced my pants...
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
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