the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
I will come over now to take full advantage of you in your vulnerable state.
Fine. I should warn you I just threw up in danas fish tank. Fish are dead. Livers dead. I smell and look like a dead animal. And not showering. So deal with it.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
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