OH MY GOD! I just remembered how we ended our bar time last night: picking up and drinking random drinks that ppl had left. wtf is wrong with us?! that's so ghetto!
No. You're kidding.
I am not. I wish I were. I speak the truth.
is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
as we were stuffing their 24 of beer into our bags you kept saying you wanted cheese strings. closest things we found were kraft singles. as the guys came up the stairs you kept screaming 'GET THE CHEESE! GET THE CHEESE!'
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
PLAN B IS EXPENSIVE ON A $50 A WEEK BUDGET.
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
THIS IS A TERRIBLE REWARD FOR NOT GETTING PREGNANT.
So I just watched a seagul attack my boss and steal his food in the parking lot. Today might not be a bad day lmfao.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
