Eric got herpes from Jo-ann
That's what he deserves for hooking up with a french canadian
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
You left the resturant and came back with a McDonalds burger in your pocket so ya...no more pregaming birthday dinners. Especially since it wasn't your birthday.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
He forehead kissed me AND THEN asked what I was thinking. I'm taking away his man card.
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Sorry you saw me having sex with your brother on the beach
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
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