you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
Just put the gallon of milk in the microwave. Dad might know im high.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
It took me 3 tries to get up the front steps. They kept me motivated by waving taco bell just out of my reach. Surprisingly effective.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
So I guess I bought a cat last night. Fuuuccckkk.
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
I just feel weird about accepting their wedding invite when I've got a post-engagement video on my phone of him jacking off in my bathroom.
Turns out naked twister is less fun than it sounds. I can never look Lee in the eye again. But Aimee's boobs are glorious.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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