also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I didn't go out last night, but I dreamed that I blacked out and the *CRAZY* thing I did was to eat 12 cupcakes off 12 diff plates and stack them up neatly. If I had a life, I'd hate it.
Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
I need thought I would ever have to use the phrase "Don't fart on that Calzone".. Thanks for that
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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