It would be worth it to see how drunk he is right now.
He cartwheeled into the side of the neighbor's garage.
Ok, i'm coming over
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
I may have been hammered and in a wheelchair but I definitely remember asking the hospital reseptionist to marry me
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
and somewhere between crying in her arms and throwing up in her front yard, we became friends.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
Dad says your scarf isnt fooling anyone and u look like a douchebag, its literally the perfect time to tell him your gay
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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