dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Having boobs is probably the greatest thing in the world, free booze all around
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
Stop recording sex noises and setting them as my ringtones. This time it was at a funeral
Randomize
