U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I'm to the point where I'm fantasizing about Iron Chefs going down on me.
Does me being hung over take away from how professional I can be today?
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Randomize
