We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
He described his sex dream about me using only emojis
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
I know her cup size but not her name....
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
