It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
I just want to have weird supply closet sex with him... and then I'll be all set. Fired, but all set.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
He rode a broom down the stairs while we were mattress surfing. Naked. Buck ass naked. WTF
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
Can we make love to the Space Jam soundtrack?
I'm pretty sure I just came a kidney stone..
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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