yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Let's be honest, I've seen a decent amount of dicks in my life and very few of them have been worth all the trouble.
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
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