Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Sorrye. The bathtuv says hi. But theresno water in it. I've wanted too tell you for the longest, but nevr could
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
I'm pretty sure my therapist gave me the green light to fuck him.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
Randomize
