just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
Wait... so you had sex and then your ear drum ruptured? I'm not sure if I want to ask if the two are related...
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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