It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
His dick was as big as my arm. Giving him a handjob was like giving someone an Indian sunburn.
Do you ever just think "I could really go for a good 30 minute blowjob". I do. Everytime jill smiles.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
we're all going for beer and wings at 7. inflate your girlfriend and bring her along too.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
He said "send me a motivational picture" so I sent one with mayo on my face that said "clearly I'm no stranger to white stuff on my face"...I'm the fuckingng worst
Randomize
