I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
I needed a test subject that didn't know any of my friends so that if i screwed up no one would really know or spread rumours about how it was the worst bj ever
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Oh, now I remember why I deleted your number. You're kind of a dick. Please delete mine.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
fyi my negative pregnancy test is taped to the fridge...i'll take it over an A+ any day. be proud.
Xanax, wine, and giving the neighbor blue balls. How about you?
Jesus, it’s Tuesday morning! Not back stage with Motley Crew
Randomize
