somebody snuck up and got me drunk
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
they're like a gay fantastic four
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
And they have kittens that decided that boobs are apparently the best arena for king of the hill...
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
Thank you, my gorgeous heroine, for being such a total life-saver by giving me rides, forcing me to eat, providing porous absorbant surfaces to bleed on, and everything else you do <3
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
Randomize
