I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
She makes me want to eat babies and throw kittens in pots of boiling water.
I awoke this morning alone and naked in my bed I forecast my date later not going so well because I have three giant hickies on my neck there is a note next to my bed that looks a 3rd grader wrote it on my college acceptance letter
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
I found her outside drinking steak sauce out of the bottle.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I don't WANT a sex disease! Especially one assigned to me by my supervisor..
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
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