just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Would giving a bouquet of flowers to my mother be a good way to say, "sorry you walked in on my boyfriend eating me out"?
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize
