Who wants to bang the sort of girl you can get with Axe body spray??
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
max decided it would be a good idea to run down the hall and smack down the exit sign. now we are sitting in the emergency room, and he is wearing the sign as a bracelet
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
She was drunk at Red Robin. She asked for more fries and then shoved them in her purse while saying "Come on bitches, you're coming with me" to them.
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
I need to get laid. Right now that freshman frat pledge & my Econ professor are the leading candidates
That’s quite a spread
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