I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
I'm starting a business if you want to get involved
oh boy
Its called Cut N Tugs, haircuts with happy endings
Just saw the true definition of the muffin top and camel toe all on one person at the DC zoo... Tried to take a pic but she got away..
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
I'm babysitting and we're watching Barney and I don't understand why Barney can magically make band hats appear but he makes them make shitty ass instruments.
Barney's a jerk
I'm drunk in class and I'm pretty sure the bible freak behind me is saying a prayer for me
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
It took me longer to jump start my car and get to his house than the fucking actually took.....
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