What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
Im not sure if he just tripped or was star gazing, but i gave him head anyway.
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Well I'm drunk and covered in baby oil so tonights not ideal
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
It's 2016 and I am a strong independent woman who just wants someone not weird to touch my butt, dammit
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
I'm fine. Heading home now...crying. Michael Bolton totally understands me!
Randomize
