I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
He's married, a coworker, and a smoker. not sure which personal rule broken i'm most ashamed of...
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
It's gotten to the point that the dirty talk in my head when I touch myself has your accent
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
WE SHOULD MAKE A WORKOUT ROUTINE CALLED BARCARDIO
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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