You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I kept whispering "I love it when you call me big papa" until she got annoyed and left
How sober do you have to be to donate blood?
Blackout strip poker. Now. Bring flashlights because we found that candles are dangerous with nudity.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
You popped the Plan B pill then clapped twice, said "mischief managed" and headed tward the bar.
just saw a kid get pissed on buy a tiger at the zoo. His dad is rofling and the kid is crying. I think I have to go make a new friend
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
I just feel like I'm worth a little bit more than your recycled nudes...
Turns out he's just a recently divorced IT guy. Not a wizard.
Randomize
