so he came in me this morning and i was like WTF DUDE. i called him Daddy until he agreed to pay the full $40 for plan B. He wants to name our Patrick because it will be a st pattys day baby. absolutely NOT.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
i just bought plan b at the bus station. happy holidays and welcome to a new level of white trashiness.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Woke up next to a slice if pizza. From what i can tell I tried to plug it into my phone charger. No more blackout wednesdays for this girl.
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
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