Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
I was struggling morally, but once I let go, I came pretty hard.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
Soon to be ex is nowhere to be found. Her attorney/new BF just showed up. 30 minutes late looking hungover. Pretty sure I'm getting the kids AND the house!
Randomize
